A guy walks into a bar with a gun and shouts “Which one of you fuckers is reposting jokes on r/jokes?” A voice from the back called out “I don’t think you have enough bullets m8.”

My father’s kids won’t get this… …love.

What’s Thom Yorke’s reddit? /u/KarmaPuhlease

How do you get to the front page of reddit ? Lack of originality

How do you get an 80 year-old woman to swear? How do you get an 80 year-old woman to yell “F*ck”? You get another 80 year-old woman next to her to yell “BINGO”

My friend Stephen misheard me when I invited him to this CrossFit gym. He’s going to have a hell of a time running in stilettos.

How much does a midget stripper with three kids get paid? Mini-mom wage.

What is moist, smells great, and is for dinner tonight? My poop

What do you call a white slave? Whipped cream.

I will let someone cut the line I’m waiting in, but only if they let me braid their hair from behind.