What do you call a nice Canadian meal on a colorful roof? Poutina.

What are the strongest days of the week? Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays.

I’d be able to find affordable glasses… In an eye deal world.

Did you hear about the car with wooden wheels, a wooden engine, and wooden doors? It wooden start

I went through a Skrillex phase I had to stop though. It got expensive dropping everything all the time!

What kind of house does Fonzie live in? An “A” frame…

Freddie Gray’s death was a real Homie-cide

What’s a homophobe’s favorite drink? fruit punch

I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say that the worst time to have a heart attack would be during a game of charades.

I told my ex I felt like killing her, and she said I needed professional help. I told her I don’t have the money to hire a hitman.