What do you call an elf made of lego? Legolass

A man with a… A man with a twelve in penis can’t spel.

A man walks into a bar… Just kidding

My friend was raped by a teenager mutant ninja turtle. He wasn’t wearing a mask, so we don’t know which one did it.

A boy met a girl She:Every time u smile, I feel like inviting u to my place He(smiling):Why thank u.. are u single? She:No, I’m a dentist

Why do rabbits love beer? Because it’s made of hops.

What does a landmine field and my pet friendly apartment complex have in common? It doesn’t matter where you step, shit is about to happen

People say you never see ninjas but I see their girlfriends hanging around mosques all the damn time.

What do you call a hobo with an afro? A frobo.

A Russian asks another Russian if he’s seen the new magic show in town. “Cock ta-da?” “Yeah, horror show.”