My paper aeroplane won’t fly. It’s completely stationery.

The awkward moment when you say, “I love you,” then the pizza delivery guy says, “That’ll be $12.46, please.”

Did you guys hear about the girl that had three vaginas? She kept getting fucked left, right and centre.

What smells worse than an anchovy? An anchovy’s cunt

Boy becomes Jedi, gets married, turns evil, has twins, becomes Darth Vader, complicated crap, ewoks. Boom, STAR WARS. You’re welcome, girls.

Did it hurt when you fell? Into the toilet, you piece of shit?

What car does the Loch Ness Monster drive? A Ford F-tree-fiddy

You know it’s cold outside when… You buy a foot long at Subway and by the time you get it to you car it’s a six inch

What did the gang-banger say when two houses fell on him? Get off me, homes.

Wanna hear a word I just made up? Plagiarism.