I have a pill that helps you lose pounds fast its called the brexit pill

I just learned you need five sheep to make a sweater. I didn’t know they knew how to knit.

What do you call a body builder? Jim.

There’s no harm in trying Unless you try to commit suicide,that will suck real bad

I have a joke about fat people with big butts… Butt weight… That’s not fanny.

A battery’s life sucks. You’re either working or you’re dead.

What’s black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson, after the autopsy.

What book do you like the most? Woman: “My husband’s checkbook.”

How I reacted to the Fine Bros controversy… [deleted]

What do you call a bone that disrespects God? A Blasfemur