How much wood would Steve Winwood win if Steve Winwood could win wood?

What did the New York Salmon say to the driver? I’m swimming here!

For someone who said “Correct me if I’m wrong…” you seemed genuinely surprised and upset when I did.

Just overheard the phrase, “pregnant with a baby,” and secretly wondered what the other options were.

What time did Sean Connery arrive at Wimbledon ? *…Tennish…*

I have over 500 FB friends but only 6 actual friends. And, I don’t even like 2 of them…

What do u call a greedy lesbian? Bush hog.

The next iPhone won’t be a failure In fact, it’ll be a huge 6S.

I would help you carry some of those bushes… but I’ve already got two palms on my hands.

During fireworks is the best time to shoot someone.