A boy at church was asked if he knew what the resurrection was. “Yes, and if it lasts more than 4 hours you’re supposed to see a doctor.”

I had a break up with my clone the other day… I was being sincere by saying, Its not you, its me.

The best things in life are free. JK, they’re carbs.

I just sprayed a mosquito with mosquito repellent. Now he’ll never have any friends.

The company that makes the Opera browser have asked Sir Patrick Stewart to redesign their logo They want him to make its O.

A family is at the table eating dinner. “I don’t like Grandpa” said the boy to his Mom. “That’s okay honey, just finish your potatoes instead.” She replied.

Guys, please don’t judge someone based on stuff they wrote themselves in a public forum meant to reach the widest possible audience.

Texas – A man convicted of robbery worked out a deal to pay $9,600 in damages rather than serving a prison sentence. He gave the court a check–a forged check. He was sentenced to ten years.

Ever read Hitler’s 2nd book? It was called Mein Bad.

Cows How does a farmer count cows? On a cowculater :D:D (ya its crap)