Two kinds of lairs when it comes to masturbation … Those that say they never have … …And those that say they quit .

Why did the man cry when he was cutting up onions? “Onions” was his dog… D:

“Alcohol is just water with feelings in it,” said the girl who failed chemistry.

What do you do if you see a space man? Park in it man.

After a number of meetings and discussions, a blonde 18-year-old was dismissed from FFA, the Future Farmers of America group. She couldn’t keep her calves together.

What is it called when Albert Einstein masturbates? A stroke of genius.

I wish my job was more like a video game. In order to be promoted to the next level, all I’d need to do is kill the boss.

What type of doctor did Batman visit after Bane broke his back? A Chiroptopracter.

Don’t click this!!! Ahahaahahaha! Gotcha!! 😛

I told my girlfriend she should work at UPS She’s good at handling packages