My doctor told me I had stop masturbating. I asked why and she said “because you’re in my office and it’s fucking disgusting.” Fair enough.

Ireland is beautiful Too bad Irish people live there

What do you call a bunch of gay slaves? Fruits of labor.

What happened to the two mad vampires? They both went a little batty.

Gays in the military “If gay men were allowed in the army, Saving Private Ryan will be a lot shorter, because it wouldn’t take them 3 hours to find Matt Damon” Adam Hills

Today holds a lot of meaning to me. Today is the 2 year anniversary that I lost my wife and children I’ll never forget that game of cards.

I went to buy a ‘Where’s Wally?’ book today but couldn’t find one anywhere. Well played, Wally. Well played.

What do you call a boyscout in WWII-era Germany? A knotzi.

I needed something to leave my door open…. So I left it ajar…. :’D

Have you heard about the latest Polish parachute? It opens on impact.