Why did the boy die? Because he ate honey nectar and then went to the store and tried to buy some mustard and got eaten by a Stegosaurus

The corner store started carrying Ben & Jerry’s Creme Brulee ice cream so if anybody needs me I’ll be fat

Do cucumbers make anyone else burp? Or am I shoving mine up to far?

If there was a race of the mentally disturbed, the necrophiliac would come in dead last Get it cus he bangs dead bodies?

What do you call a half gay man? A semicolon.

Leave a Post-It on your girlfriend’s birth control that says, “guess u don’t want 2 have my babies haha.”

Religion That is all

In honour of St Patrick’s day, can you guess my Irish name? Pat MiGroin. Yeah, my grandpa just told me that one…some visual images cannot be unseen.

It’s hard to compare Stevie Wonder to Ray Charles They are both just so out of sight

Did you hear about the donut who split from his wife? She’s terrible with the kids so he’s filling for custody.