[titanic] SAILER: but captain there’s an ice berg right ahead CAPTAIN WHO LOOKS SUSPICIOUSLY LIKE A SHARK: i said straight ahead

Still looking both ways on one-way streets.

What bone will a dog never eat a trombone

[job interview] “What’s your greatest weakness?” Alcohol “Umm ok, how about strengths?” *pouring him a shot* Sharing

What is the coldest dish at a Mexican restaurant? a b-r-r-r-r-ito

Why did the French construct the Maginot Line? To keep the Nazis in Czech!

What did the leper say to the prostitute after their session? “Keep the tip.”

What do you call a black kid riding a bike????? A thief….

What’s the best side to eat from a chicken? The inside.

Hawaiian terrorists be like… Aloha Akbar