Whats the differance between a terrorist and a yiddish mama? You can negotiate with terrorists

My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash and it’s gone.

Old people, when you say “the good ol’ days,” do you mean during the draft, or when black people had separate bathrooms?

Old people, when you say “the good ol’ days,” do you mean during the draft, or when black people had separate bathrooms?

Did you hear that Lorena Bobbitt got killed in a car crash? ……yeah, some dick cut her off……………..

People always look at me weird when I argue with my food, but what can I say? I cook a mean steak.

My friends hate my cheese jokes. They said that they’re no Gouda

What do you call a German guy wearing basketball shoes? Herr Jordan

What do you call Mexican stoners? Baked beans

I went to London over the weekend and wore tracksuit bottoms in the hope of fitting in. How wrong I was. If I really wanted to fit in, I should have wore a turban.